Nobody Disses the Blow (Actually, Everyone Does)

Barack Obama's camp has said thanks but no thanks to an offer by Lindsay Lohan to host a series of youth-targeted campaign events. "[Lindsay] is not exactly the kind of high-profile star who would be a positive for us," an Obama staffer told the Chicago Sun-Times. Apparently Obama doesn't like lesbians. Except his wife. I'm not apologizing. They should apologize to Lindsay for rebuffing her. She's just trying to help for God's sake. I mean, Barack Obama has no problem accepting the support of Ted Kennedy, and he fucking murdered a chick. Sure, Lindsay may be a muff-diving vodka-sneaker with a bit of a coke habit, but she was never guilty of dumping any piece of ass into the drink.

How much you wanna bet the McCain camp had something to say about this? Yup - they did. "So let me get this straight," said a McCain aide, "they turned away Lindsay Lohan, but Barack Obama has friends like unrepentant terrorist Bill Ayers and convicted felon Tony Rezko? Maybe LiLo is just too upstanding for Barack Obama." If he were hip he would've called her LesLo. Honestly, if these idiot politicians don't stop with the celeb stuff, I'm going to stow away on the plane when Alec Baldwin finally moves to Tajikistan. Do they have bloggers in Tajikistan?