Clean Matthew, Dirty Kate

I don't like Matthew McConaughey all cleaned-up and shaved and dressed like a normal person. I want Matthew the natural man. Matthew the guy who looks like he just washed up on the beach, picked the seaweed from his hair and staggered off to find a human woman to mate with. Nice package-emphasizing pose there Matthew, by the way. And what exactly are you wearing on your feet there? Blue soles?

Kate Hudson I couldn't care less about. She's an uninteresting tramp. I would've x'ed her sorry face out but I'm too lazy today.