The on-going Britney Spears saga has been very entertaining for all of us who follow celeb gossip. It's had everything: drugs, insanity, coochie-flashes, custody battles, child endangerment, gold-digging boyfriends, televised police interventions...the whole bit.
Well, almost the whole bit.
There has been one thing missing, frankly, from the Britney drama - the only thing that could ratchet the lunacy up that last level from the extreme to the cosmically mindblowing.
Yes, the crazed religion of Tom Cruise and John Travolta is the one maniacal element that's been lacking during the entire Britney mess. Thankfully, a dubious British publication called the Sunday Express has remedied this. They, at long last, have shown the creativity necessary to wed Britney and Scientology.
And "wed" is the appropriate word here, for it's a wedding rumor that the Sunday Express has chosen to spread. To be precise: the Sunday Express is alleging that Britney wants to marry the paparazzo she's been having sex with, Adnan Ghalib (never mind that Ghalib is already married - there are ways around that sort of thing anyway). Furthermore, according to the paper's "sources," Britney has told her family that she and Ghalib, a Muslim, intend to have a Scientology minister perform the ceremony.
This is what is known in the biz as "perfect bullshit." Not your run-of-the-mill load of hooey but something so beautifully crafted that, were it possible to have such stuff framed, one would immediately get on the phone to the proper professionals, and have the mounted specimen dispatched thence to the Smithsonian.
You have to love the British tabs...there is nothing, I mean nothing, those fuckers won't print.
Sunday, January 13, 2008