Lindsay Lohan is going to take a little break from rehab this week - if you want to call being in the presence of Michael Lohan for five days "a break." Yes, it appears our worst fears for Lindsay have come to pass - Michael has gotten his hooks into her. For the next week Lindsay and Michael will be spending quality-time together, as part of Cirque Lodge's alleged out-patient therapy program. So Cirque Lodge has signed off on the whole thing. They actually think it will do Lindsay good to be in the company of a pseudo-Christian ex-con former drug-addict. Honestly, I think Lindsay would be better off spending a week with Pete Doherty, Courtney Love and Steve Coogan, but what the hell do I know?
Of course Michael is dishing out the usual helping of mawkish nonsense. Here's what he said about the place Lindsay has arrived at in her life:
I'm looking forward to spending the next week with her. We've been in constant phone contact. She's in a great, great place now. I've never heard her so honest, contrite and focused. Lindsay is weeding out all the bad. She's taking a step back and reevaluating her life. What she tells - her honesty and openness - has brought me to tears. It's beyond words how proud I am of her.
Wait a minute...was that Michael or Dina? No, it was Michael. Jesus, their bullshit has become indistinguishable. Poor Lindsay, having to be saddled with these pieces of garbage for the rest of her life. Maybe she could escape somehow. Stick a knife in that fucker Michael and just beat it for South America. A red-headed white girl could probably make a bundle down there. Or maybe she could become some drug kingpin's girlfriend. Damn, that would be great for her. All the dope she could ever want and she'd never have to worry about the cops again.