Keira Knightley at the London premiere of Atonement. I'm not even going to say anything about that ludicrous dress, or the fact that the body it's on appears to belong to a decomposing corpse. I'm past all that. What I want to focus on now is Keira's obvious contempt for all the red carpet shit. I mean, I'm pretty sure there are lots of stars who hate having to get gussied up and parade themselves in front of photographers and drooling fans - they probably view this as frivolous and idiotic, and yes, I'd have to agree with them that it is. However, most of these people, when they have to haul themselves through one of these events, at least try to plaster a fake smile on their faces - you know, for the fans. Keira, however, prefers to scowl in her familiar way - because Keira wants us all to know how much she despises this part of being a star, how cheapened and diminished she feels by having to make a spectacle of herself. Keira, you see, is a sensitive artist - she makes films that probe the depths of the human soul, like and Pirates of the Caribbean and The Jacket, and all this other stuff is so horribly beneath her. Okay, fine Keira - you think it's crap. However, there are better ways of showing your disdain. You know, you could at least try to be witty about it. Make light of the whole thing by showing up dressed in some rag you pulled out of a dumpster. Or, you could always just, you know, not show up? I think the world would probably keep turning if you didn't put on your dumb-ass dress and stand there glowering like someone just invaded your privacy. But, I guess those options never occurred to you. You'd rather go with your painfully unsubtle "I hate everyone" approach. Maybe next time you could complete the image by wearing black lipstick and having a Cure song played as you stepped from the limo. Oh you're so deep Keira - just like that chick who works down at the Holiday station, who wears thick eye make-up and has Sylvia Plath quotes tattooed on her forearm. Dumb bitch.
Keira Knightley Is A Ray Of Sunshine
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Posted by Melvin Ayatollahofrock'nrolla at 12:46 PM
Labels: Keira Knightley
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
How tragic that a woman as beautiful as Keira Knightley feels that she needs to starve herself down to the state that she is in now. Sadly, she really feels she looks good this way. Hollywood is just so screwed up.
She's grumpy all the time because she is frigging starving!! She's just hungry!!! But of course, she doesn't want anyone to comment on her weight, or lack thereof. That's why she wears gowns like this. The more bones she exposes the better she feels.
Keira, eat a cheeseburger!
I am just curious Crabbie who do you continue to hate on celebrities who are clearly better than you? I mean what is it? Is it jealousy because they have things you don’t have? You know like beauty, wealth, fame, fortune, good manners, intelligence or what not? I mean I continue to read this bull shit that comes out of your ignorance ridden mouth and I just can’t help laugh at all the pious BS that you can’t seem to stop talking about. I’m beginning to think you are ENVIOUS of Keira Knightley just like the rest of the retards who agree with you. Let’s break down this post shall we?
This post here is just in clear indication that you lack any sort of a social life outside of your PC, shit hole apartment, basically anything that has to do with you running your uneducated mouth on things you have no idea what you are talking about. Like I said before. You claim to hate these celebrities by calling them twits bitches and every nasty word in the book yet you can’t even stop talking about them. What does that really say about you now? I mean are you even remotely thinking about originality or are you just following the trend of being a loser stuck in your mom’s basement with no job waking up in the morning just to hate on other celebrities? Yeah that’s real original. Make a web page for all your ho hum opinions and broadcast it like fuck crazy. You’re about as original the next dating reality show sweetie.
So you want her to actually go our and say “You Rude Fuck” at a prestigious red carpet event where people are taking snap shots at her and looking at her every movement at what not right? Yeah uh huh that clearly shows that you have no idea what celebrity life is like and you have no clue what it is like to BE a celebrity. Do the world a favor and the people who are just groaning at your on going stupidity and please just go back to school. Seriously common sense goes a long way and it’s always good to actually learn a thing or two about real life. Here’s one life lesson. Don’t talk shit about things you don’t know. And if a teacher agrees with what you say then they’ve obviously wasted a lot of government money on you and they are either hack teachers or certifiably insane. But let’s see if we can get into your mind set now can we?
So here I am, some unemployed 35 year old man or woman who’s probably so fuck ugly that I can’t even show my ugly ass face in public without some one taking a loogie right onto my eye socket. Mommy and daddy are obviously disappointed in me for being an unsociable little dip shit who has no friends to hang with and no body likes. It pisses me off to see all these beautiful successful actresses and models to come on and show me how lovely they are and how much money they make when I am stuck here in my mom’s basement looking like the elephant Lady. Fuck I’m so pissed I’m going to do what every fat overweight pompous jack ass critic will do and just hate on her and blow everything she says out of proportion. That instead of going through the motions like a typical movie-star drone. Sorry Keira - but until you translate your bullshit into action, and just stop showing up or otherwise rebel against the things you pretend not to like, we will continue perceiving you as nothing but a spoiled whining little hypocrite.
Again I ask why do you bother talking about someone you hate? Seems to me you have LOT of time on your hands to be putting all your energy on hating celebrities who are way better than you are. Fact is celebrities like Keira Knightley are one of the most sought ought young actresses in both the LOOKS and the talent department. Which brings me to my second theory that you yourself were on the road to becoming an actress or someone in the move business or entertainment business. But you lack of knowledge (seeing as how you actually WANT her to say You Rude Fuck) in the area as well as the probably obvious fact that you just absolutely SUCK at being entertaining or acting or directing or any of that shit prevented you from actually going far in the world of entertainment. So like my previous assessment you decided to bitch about it like the pseudo intellectual pompous brat you are right? Thought so.
Also the obvious faux pas you made in statements like “We will continue to perceive you as nothing but a spoiled whining little hypocrite” is just absolutely inaccurate and once again shows you have nothing better to do than make up BS you know nothing about. Celebrities like Keira Angelina, and what not have worked HARD to get where they are now and they deserve their money and fame and whatever they have gotten out of it. You know what these people actually started with when they first got into this business? Nothing! You invalid little ignorant fuck. They had NOTHING. Keira’s family consisted of a struggling stage actor and a playwright who barely had a name until their DAUGHTER got famous. Maybe if you actually looked shit up instead of just running your ignorant mouth you might actually LEARN something about these people that you loath and hate like the internet fascist prick you are.
And you are calling them hypocrites? That’s funny coming from some venomous little imbecile that has no fucking clue how the entertainment business (The one that they hate so much) works. You honestly think if she said “Fuck you” to some one that it would show her in a GOOD light? I guess concepts like class and stiff upper lip are foreign to you. Well it’s obviously because you lack both.
Hell you even in-avertedly admit to your own venomous and uneducated behavior as well. First off you have no idea what the word self absorbed means since you use the term so loosely. I mean do you even have any idea how to use the term? Here’s a little pro tip. Don’t use terms you know jack shit about. It makes you look like a moron and from the looks if it, it’s not hard to do. Second the only person who has this whole perception about her thinking that “She’s bitching about her looks because we’re not all beautiful people like you.” persona. Which clearly shows that you have some serious deep seated mental issues like all these other so called “Original Thinkers” out there who really have no other purpose in their lack luster life than to just say other mindless abuse towards celebrities that they claim to hate yet can’t stop talking about like some half rate Perez Hilton (Then again Perez Hilton is no better than you’re dumb ass is)
Finally let’s talk about your “Knowledge” or lack thereof about anorexic. I mean cause according to you, skinny automatically means anorexic right? I mean you don’t take into account things like HEALTH metabolism or genes into this little equation now do you? Your knowledge about the subject is about as limited as your knowledge about fashion sense.
So my advice is to get some help. Clearly you need to get that those mental insecurities under control before you eventually self destruct like the paparazzi equivalent little douche bag you are. Thank you
I always wondered what it took to be a spiteful hate filled blog poster who thinks everything and everyone sucks these days and takes the words of celebrities and call it idiotic nonsensical crap like “infantile blather” and I think I now know what it is. With the help of Crabbies Hollywood I came up with a plan and a step program to actually help people achieve their dream of being. This easy five step program will help you become a angst ridden unpopular rage filled blog poster that has to get their frustration out on the internet because they are too chicken shit to actually say it in real life.
Step 1. No original thought.
Follow the trend of other bitchy hypocritical blog posters with nothing better to do in their lack luster and for the most part meaningless life than to rag on celebrities they claim they can’t stand. Being a blog poster doesn’t take much thought nor does it actually take a lot of talent to do. It’s not to hard to string together a bunch of cleverly made insults together but over use it like fucking crazy to give the illusion that you are an “Original Thinker” when in reality you’re just following the same idiotic “I hate Hollywood because people are so fake” trend. Remember you don’t want people to actually THINK you are normal.
Step 2. Appear angry, full of consent and spite.
Blog posters are never happy and never appear to be reasonable. Remember that when you are hit by an onslaught of insults from normal people who are just surfing the web, Always appear like you have a pineapple shoved up your ass. Remember you want to give the illusion that you are a person that has a life yet you can insult other famous people who are better than you when in reality most likely future blog posters will be near homeless working at meaningless jobs like McDonalds because you are to busy insulting other people and resenting them for being better off than you are. Most likely cause you are to fucking busy insulting others who are more better off than you instead of actually doing something with your life.
Step 3. Hide your hypocrisy.
When being an internet blog mogul you will become a true blue hypocrite. For instance claiming you hate a certain band, celebrity, movie, producer, director and what not yet can’t stop talking shit about them to save your life. This will be the backbone of almost every nonsensical post you are writing and if you’re not careful, your hypocrisy will stick out. The key is to hide it. Know how to hide your own wishy washy BS by making ANOTHER post on how you hate certain said celebrity. Contradict earlier points you have made when being called out by some one else. These steps will help shape you into the perfect internet blog posting winner (Another word for no life loser). Remember to always call celebs a whore when you are in fact making pointless posts for attention as well. Always conceal your OWN whorish behavior.
Step 4. Never show your picture when criticizing other people’s looks.
Most blog poster are fuck ugly and have been picked on their entire life because they are either ugly, stupid, had no friends, where completely unpopular, had to rely on other unpopular people as their friends, or just all of the above. So because of this, your high voltage of hostility will eventually turn other people towards appearances of celebrities. When doing so, it is critical to never show a picture of yourself to open yourself up to attacks about YOUR appearance and YOUR pictures. Your overshadowed coward ness most always be concealed so people don’t find out the real truth that you’re some ugly bum.
Step 5. Finally. Advertise OTHER stupid internet celebrity haters.
That’s right. You want all the help you can get when becoming a petty little hater with a stupid website. And what better way to gain experience than to whore yourself out to OTHER haters out there (which also brings up the hypocrisy bit). Remember you need troops to fight your stupid little internet war. Your lack of a social life is an advantage but you need other unemployed losers on your side.
Well there you have it. 5 easy steps to actually become a celebrity bashing blogger. Hope these steps will help and I wish you good luck in reaching your goal of mediocrity.
Further to my textual chlamydia at 12:08 AM, I'd just like to admit that I have a pet warthog and I really enjoy raping it with my feet.
This won't really have success, I feel like this.
Post a Comment