Naomi Campbell is about to find out how the other half lives. You know, the half that actually has to work for a living. That doesn't just get to prance up and down a runway in somebody's stupid-looking clothes and get paid an outrageous amount of money for it. No, Naomi's going to get a taste of what life is like for the unglamorous, courtesy of the United States legal system.
As you may recall, Naomi was sentenced to community service a couple months ago after being found guilty of assaulting her maid. Well, later this week, a judge is going to lay out exactly what that community service is going to entail. And thanks to the New York Daily News we already know what the punishment is going to be - five days of sweeping and mopping floors in a New York City public building.
Naomi Campbell as Cinderella. Without the cinders. And without the Wicked Stepsisters. Though it would be fun if there were a couple of mean old warty bitches to heckle her while she was mopping hallways. I wonder if Cindy Crawford and Elle McPherson are doing anything? They're both icky and old now, and probably pretty mean. And they hate Naomi too I bet. Everyone does. Especially Tyra Banks, who could play the Wicked Stepmother. And of course Terrence Howard has to be Prince Charming. In this version of the story however, Prince Charming finds out that Cinderella ain't all she's cracked up to be - when she buries the heel of her glass slipper between his shoulderblades.
Seriously though, five days of sweeping floors for Naomi. I wouldn't mind seeing that. Unfortunately, there probably won't be any pictures. Naomi's lawyers were adamant in insisting their client get indoor work, away from the paparazzi, and it looks like the judge has granted them the request. Too bad. Would've been cool to see her in an orange vest sticking cigarette butts with one of those long deals with the spike on the end.
Monday, March 05, 2007