Janet Jackson, Still Causing Nightmares

Janet Jackson at the Ebony Pre-Oscar party. All right, I'm officially haunted again. Not by her great beauty but by her scariness. Honestly, someone needs to make a law against Jacksons being seen in public. They're all frightening. It doesn't matter how hard they try - they just can't help it anymore. Janet, she's got those manic-yet-vacant eyes, like a serial killer. Seriously, I haven't been this terrified since I was a kid, and my dreams were haunted by a clown named Mr. Pickles. He used to sneak into my room and do horrible things to me with a giant pickle. Of course, later on I discovered that my "dreams" were actually real, that "Mr. Pickles" was really my uncle Bernie, and that the pickle wasn't no pickle...